through my eyes

nsfw/body positive/sex positive
There are times when a feeling of expectancy comes to me, as if something is there, beneath the surface of my understanding, waiting for me to grasp it. It is the same tantalizing sensation when you almost remember a name, but don’t quite reach it. I can feel it when I think of human beings, of the hints of evolution suggested by the removal of wisdom teeth, the narrowing of the jaw no longer needed to chew such roughage as it was accustomed to; the gradual disappearance of hair from the human body; the adjustment of the human eye to the fine print, the swift, colored motion of the twentieth century. The feeling comes, vague and nebulous, when I consider the prolonged adolescence of our species; the rites of birth, marriage and death; all the primitive, barbaric ceremonies streamlined to modern times. Almost, I think, the unreasoning, bestial purity was best. Oh, something is there, waiting for me. Perhaps someday the revelation will burst in upon me and I will see the other side of this monumental grotesque joke. And then I’ll laugh. And then I’ll know what life is.
Sylvia Plath (via fernsandmoss)



So, about a month ago, I decided to switch birth control methods from the depo-provera shot to the implanon implant.

Implanon/Nexplanon is a small matchstick sized implant that is placed under the skin of your upper arm (typically of your non-dominant arm). It prevents pregnancy by continuously releasing the synthetic hormone progestin. This hormone works to prevent pregnancy by stopping eggs from being released by the ovaries.

The implant is highly effective. The implanon failure rate is .05% (x). 

What’s so great about this birth control method is it doesn’t require much work! Go to the doctor, get it implanted, and you’re safe from pregnancy for three whole years (assuming it was implanted correctly and no weird drug interactions happen)! This is a great method for me, and others like me, because I am HIGHLY forgetful. The pill was impossible for me, and even the shot (which you only have to get once every three months) was hard for me to remember.

I’m writing this post directed at fat people because, since posting about my implanon adventures, I’ve received several messages from concerned people saying things like “My doctor says I can’t get the implant because I’m fat!” or “I’m worried about the implant not working because I’m overweight”, and other things of that vein.

That was also a concern of mine, because I’d seen conflicting things about the effectiveness of the implant on overweight people. The first thing I said to my doctor about switching was “I’m thinking about the implant but I’ve read I can’t get it because of my weight.”

My fabulous doctor rolled her eyes and told me I could totally get the implant!

The concern about the effectiveness of the implant for overweight people comes from this little tidbit on implanon/nexplanon’s website:

It is not known if NEXPLANON is as effective in very overweight women because studies did not include many overweight women. If you are overweight, your health care provider may advise you to replace the implant earlier than 3 years.” (x)

From another website:

"The efficacy of NEXPLANON in women who weighed more than 130% of their ideal body weight has not been defined because such women were not studied in clinical trials. Serum concentrations of etonogestrel are inversely related to body weight and decrease with time after implant insertion. Therefore, NEXPLANON may be less effective in overweight women." (x)

So, because our great medical industrial complex doesn’t deem it necessary to study medicine in fat people (even though fat people make up a large majority of this country…) there are some unknowns as far as the effectiveness of this product in overweight people. However, no where that I can find, anywhere on the whole wide internet,  does it say “The implant doesn’t work on fat people”

So, if you’re ever in a situation where your doctor says that to you, PLEASE find a new doctor. You deserve to receive the healthcare you want, including the birth control you want. There is no reason you should be denied access to this method because of your weight!

If you, like me, are overweight and trust the effectiveness of this birth control, then search for a doctor that will give you the implant! 

I know this is really long but hopefully it’s informative!!

(via bumsquash)


UNUSUAL HOARD commission for torotix ! almost everything in this one can be found somewhere on the floor of my room

(via iguanamouth)





I tried a 2-D printer once, and the paper jammed.

So now I just painstakingly re-create my paper copies by hand, like a medieval monk.

i tried using paper, but the edges crumpled

so now i just chisel my commandments into stone, like old testament god

I tried using stone, but it cracked and broke.

Now I just scream everything at passersby, hoping they’ll remember what I said so I can ask them about it when I need it.

I tried shouting things at passersby but they ignored me.

Now I emit allohormones in a gypsobelum that bonds selectively with the recipient’s hemolymph to reconfigure their bursa copulax into a copulatory canal. I can only say one thing, “I want to mate with you,” but really, what else ever needs to be said?

(via kilgore-doubt)


it wet


it wet

(via pizza)


the urban dictionary definition of mens rights activists is so spot on it hurts-

‘a bunch of whiny pedantic morons that think there is some vast illuminati feminist conspiracy while seemingly ignoring the fact that their own gender runs and ruins the majority of the world’

(via kilgore-doubt)


So I was talking to my friend about colouring books and she showed me this one.


And then there was this page.


And finally this absolute gem!


How amazing is this book?! I want one.

(via ravingsofabitch)





The thing about teasers is that they are supposed to lead to something more, something even better. The brilliant folks over at Dear White People headquarters get that. Shortly after the announcement of the film’s nationwide premiere date they released a teaser trailer to whet our appetites. Monday afternoon fans were told, with 100 retweets and 1000 shares on Facebook, we could see the full trailer before it hits theaters this weekend. In less than 24 hours (almost instantly on Twitter) – mission accomplished.

The full trailer for the highly anticipated indie darling turned Lionsgate production, Dear White People, has been released. Starring Tessa Thompson (For Colored Girls), Dennis Haysbert (24), Teyonah Parris (Mad Men) and Tyler James Williams (Everybody Hates Chris), with a crop of brilliant fresh faces of color (Ashley Blaine Featherson, Courtney Sauls, Nia Jervier, Marque Richardson, Naomi Ko) rounding out a remarkable ensemble cast, Dear White People is the film that so many have been waiting for.

The full trailer is two minutes and 37 seconds of poignant comedy and thought-provoking sound-bites – a pretty apt summary of the film that writer, director, Justin Simien says is one about identity not race. Dear White People is a smart, hilarious and ever-relevant look into the lives of four Black students – Lionel, Sam, Coco and Troy – at the fictional Winchester University, where the population of Blacks is a mere 2%.

We’ve already seen the film and we’re still anticipating the October 17th release as much as the next person. We say with immense certainty that the Lena Waithe-produced Dear White People is the first and best deliberately conscious, non-struggle Black film we’ve seen on the big screen in easily the last five years.


I. CAN’T. WAIT!!!!!

It’s gon be so good.

I’m just ready!





Reddit user IMAMenlo found a handwritten note on an empty chair at the San Francisco Airport. It didn’t have anything except “read me” written on the outside. 

This is what it says:

recently left an emotionally abusive relationship.

After months of insults I wont repeat, false accusations, lies, delusions, broken mirrors, nightly battles…. I left. I know that I was being poisoned by each day that I stayed. So with a heavy heart, I left my lover of three years, knowing that I had already put it off too long. At first he begged, then he cursed, but eventually he paced his bags and faded out of my life like a bad dream.

For the first few weeks, my body seemed to reject this. For three years I had seen the world through him-colered glasses. I didn’t know who I was without him. Despite the kindness of friends and even strangers. I could not help feeling utterly alone.

But it was this sense of aloneness that set me free. Somewhere along the way, I let go. I released all of the painful memories, the names he had called me, the shards of him buried deep in my brain. I stopped believing the things he had made me think about myself. I began to see how extraordinary, breathtakingly beautiful life is. I meditated, drank too much coffee, talked to strangers, laughed at nothing. I wrote poetry and stopped to smell and photograph every flower. Once I discovered that my happiness depends only on myself, nothing could hurt me anymore.

I have found and continue to find peace. Each day I am closer to it than I was yesterday. I am a work in progress but I am full to the brim with gratitude and joy.

And so, since I have opened a new chapter in my life, I want to peacefully part with the contents of the last chapter. The end of my relationship was the catalyst for a wealth of positive changes in my life. It was a symbol, most importantly, it was an act of self-love. It was a realization that I deserved to be happy and I could choose to be. And so, in an effort to leave behind the things that do not help me grow, I am letting go of a relic from the painful past.

I wore this necklace-a gift from him-every day for over two years. To me, letting it go is a joyous declaration that I am moving forward with strength and grace and deep, lasting peace.

Please accept this gift as a reminder that we all deserve happiness. Whoever you are, and whatever pain you have faced, I hope you find peace.


I hope this inspired/encouraged anyone going through the same thing to leave.  

Another inspiring post

Been there. This is one of the most important posts, I have ever seen on Tumblr. Love yourself my friends, and know, there is that one person out there, that will cherish everything about you. Settle for nothing less. Understand that, being utterly alone at times, can have, and be something not to fear, but something of great value to your soul. Treat others as you wish to be treated. This is the golden rule. Follow it, and with time, and patience, you will obtain happiness. One love, and God bless my friends.

I think we’ve all been through that one relationship that will haunt us for a long time to come. But honestly, once you realize that you and only you have the key to your own happiness, the world will vibrate with colors you’ve never seen before 

(via luckydreaming)


We need more guides on strip club etiquette! Check out this week’s Oh Joy Sex Toy to find out more.

(via ravingsofabitch)

Ancient moon priestesses were called virgins. ‘Virgin’ meant not married, not belonging to a man - a woman who was ‘one-in-herself’. The very word derives from a Latin root meaning strength, force, skill; and was later applied to men: virle. Ishtar, Diana, Astarte, Isis were all all called virgin, which did not refer to sexual chastity, but sexual independence. And all great culture heroes of the past, mythic or historic, were said to be born of virgin mothers: Marduk, Gilgamesh, Buddha, Osiris, Dionysus, Genghis Khan, Jesus - they were all affirmed as sons of the Great Mother, of the Original One, their worldly power deriving from her. When the Hebrews used the word, and in the original Aramaic, it meant ‘maiden’ or ‘young woman’, with no connotations to sexual chastity. But later Christian translators could not conceive of the ‘Virgin Mary’ as a woman of independent sexuality, needless to say; they distorted the meaning into sexually pure, chaste, never touched.
Monica Sjoo, The Great Cosmic Mother: Rediscovering the Religion of the Earth   (via dilfcomplex)

(via ravingsofabitch)



he came and he conquered

omg 😍


23 Women Show Us Their Favorite Position 

by Elizabeth Plank

When reality television star and fashion blogger Lauren Conrad was asked what her “favorite position” was on a live radio program a while back, the women listening held their breath. Read the whole piece


Chefchaouen, a small town in northern Morocco, has a rich history, beautiful natural surroundings and wonderful architecture, but what it’s most famous for are the striking and vivid blue walls of many of the buildings in its “old town” sector, or medina.

The maze-like medina sector, like those of most of the other towns in the area, features white-washed buildings with a fusion of Spanish and Moorish architecture. The brilliantly blue walls, however, seem to be unique to Chefchaouen. They are said to have been introduced to the town by Jewish refugees in 1930, who considered blue to symbolize the sky and heaven. The color caught on, and now many also believe that the blue walls serve to repel mosquitoes as well (mosquitoes dislike clear and moving water).

Whatever the reason, the town’s blue walls attract visitors who love to wander the town’s narrow streets and snap some beautiful photos. 

(via apprendmoi)